​The Darker Side of Truth 

Honesty is the best policy they say, I think it’s true, what I doubt is that it brings peace to minds of those who think the truth is bright and beautiful. 
The truth hurts they say, see…now we are getting somewhere. The truth has a bad habit of hitting your guts with the reality of what’s really going on, as opposed to what you would like to think is going on. 

I am a first hand victim to what this line of thinking can do to you, now I am an undergrad graduate due to the lessons I’ve learnt 😊 . Sometimes, the best thing you can do is to face the truth head on and in the mist of ‘what is’ you can consciously be aware of what is going on and make better choices.

The Truth will set you free,they say… oh I bet you it will. The misconception here is that it is perceived that ‘the good people’ of the world are honest, now now, we know that’s a lie, good people lie a lot to maintain their ‘good person image’. I’ve noticed how when a someone cheats in a relationship, or someone has a huge secret they can’t bear to keep to themselves, they tell the truth to ease their guilt, is about the, not the other person, ‘as they claim’, but ay…I could be wrong, but think about it. In no way am I excusing those who are hurtful and spiteful to others and claim that ‘they just honest, people should take it and should be strong enough to handle it’. 

The power of truth is born within the intent. I once heard someone say, being nice is fake, you know, how white folks fake smile you when you meet them in the corridors or the elevator? Yes, being kind on the other hand, is real, its genuine. 

I choose to be a truth teller with the intent to become a better person, not at the expense of others misery but rather the profit of my growth.  

Flirting with my past 

A few weeks ago, we buried my cousin💔💣, as I grew up knowing her to be ( you know black people, everyone is your cousin especially if you’re around the same age). It’s strange how the kind of interactions you had with someone who has passed , really forces you to think about your own existence. 

In this time of grieving and funeral preparations I spent alot more time in my birth place town than i have in over 10 years. Reconnecting with family and old childhood friends we used to play in the streets with,sad what modern Western tendencies we have developed, seeing family after decades unless funerals occur inbetween.

I sort of felt myself emotionally being caught up between who I was back then, and who I am now, during this period.

For starters my desire to constantly seek the approval of those I look up to, I was shocked to realize that i actually hadn’t let go of that habit, in my current self state. I still did not like being obviously rebellious, and would then need to sneak around or allow myself to be dictated to even if I had good reason for the things I had chosen to do. I should know better right, and own my decisions? I thought…

Growing up has an added element to it in my life now, because it means appreciating who i was and balancing it with who I am, and who I want to be, and have those personalities, co-exisit, because I have something significant to learn from my different states of being , and that is what makes me unique from the next individual.

No one can teach you how to be yourself, I’ve spent so much time learning from other people and from books,  I left learning from myself last on the list.

Being in my home birth place town, Soweto…made me realize that I’ve neglected to create my own constitution of how to live my life, and learn enough about what works for me, as opposed to what worked for others.

I’ve come a long way, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, but there is so much about my past personality that i have decided to revisit and develop because I had so much more empathy, love and respect, so much stronger and a lot happier haha🤔😃, regardless of lifes challenges that occurs with growth into adulting, I knew more about my true self back then, that i’d chosen to forget in my present self, because of choices I made out of fear, when i really think about it,🤐😕.

It’s important to be conscious of your habits and reasons for those habits, they will tell you alot about where you are from and where you are going, and your awareness gives you the opportunity and power to indicate direction to where to next, instead of constantly going where the wind blows you, and feeling frustrated when you end up in an unplanned place. 👀

They say the past, present and the future co-exisits simultaneously, in the spiritual world, because depending on how you choose to perceive things in these different states of being, you see a different possible future.💬🤔

 I don’t know how true this is, but i see God working on all levels of my life and I can see how it works together and I have absolute FAITH my purpose is being fulfilled to the level of OUR choice. 

Flirting with my past reminded me of the grace upon my life, and the importance of my growth from my roots, that do not need to be cut off, but rather recognized, nurtured and developed together with my present, and future. 

Happy Monday 

Love Life, Live Life, Be of Life! ❤